I was struck by this post on Man Vs. Debt and he was inspired to write it based on this post at The Art of Non-Conformity by Chris Guillebeau. I don’t often write posts based on other things I’ve read but this hit me because it helped put words to things I’ve been thinking about and feeling for some time.
Are you doing what you were trained to do?
I’m not…I wasn’t trained to do anything.
I did well in school until about 8th grade, from then until graduating high school I simply did enough to get by. I hated high school with a passion and now looking back I realize it was because it went against who I was. All the clicks, gossip, arrogance, and value put into insignificant things like clothes and the kind of car you drive have always been against how I feel inside.
Unfortunately I fell into the trap…but I’ve been cutting the fat for the last few years and am finding me again.
College was fun but for some reason I never had any real motivation for it, therefore after roughly five years in community college I bailed and started my first business in 2006. I now own four businesses and I ‘m just not having fun with two of them anymore, although they’ve been very good to me and I’ve learned a ton…I want out!
And this brings us back to that question in bold up above.
I wasn’t trained to do anything, nobody taught me how to run a business or deal with getting business licenses or my California contractor’s license…I just figured shit out. There was nobody there to teach me how to get business, advertise, or take care of the money…I just figured that out too. I am not qualified to do anything therefore I had to make my own path and do what felt right on the fly.
When I have discussed getting rid of two of my businesses I have had people look at me like I was stupid. When I have told people that my goal is to work from a laptop full time the looks get even worse. I think those people are caught up in the broken system of qualifying everything and doing what that broken system requires of you.
I simply feel that this life is an experiment and just because I started a painting business doesn’t mean I have to do that forever. If I say my favorite color is blue, do I have the right to change that at any point in my life? I say yes and I do not think there’s a difference between changing my favorite color or wanting to change my business.
For the last month I have been thinking about buying some paints and canvas to mess around with painting (not houses) but one of my original thoughts was why would I waste my time doing that since I have never painted before or taken art classes. That’s just it though…I feel like doing it, so shouldn’t that be enough?
The painting is just one small example but the point is the same across the board. This is my one shot at life and I don’t want to miss out on something because I am too tied up with something else or because the system thinks I need to do something a certain way. When you think of the words adventure and experiment you certainly don’t think about status quo or coloring inside the lines….but life IS an adventure of experiments…it’s meant to be lived and I don’t feel I can fully live my life if I allow qualifications to hold me back.
So it turns out the one thing we are each qualified to do is to make our own path…I’m working on mine now, are you?
I fully believe in living life by own set of rules and not by what society deems as excepted or proper. The only person I need to abide by in this life is me.
I definitely agree Susan…even though we can’t totally leave societies rules we can absolutely create our own lifestyle. It’s amazingly liberating when you start figuring that out. Thanks for the comment!!
I graduated high school and “got the heck out of dodge” beause of expectations to conform! Can I purchase one of your first paintings! Go for it Matt! :^)
You rock Denise!! It’s funny how there’s “expectation” to conform…some of that is from society and some is from WE thing we need to conform…interesting game. The goal is to have the paints set up before the month is over and than see what happens!! Thank you again for the support Denise!!
We are so aligned here!
http://www.nickkellet.com/2012/02/park-your-fears-go-experiment/
I love to paint cavas – acrylics too.
I was going to paint one per chapter for my book. Alas that got sidelined.
That’s the fun thing about experiments. One leads to another. You get into your zone. Into your flow. It’s not work. It’s fun. Pure addictive fun. Great post!
And we still havent Skyped!
Matt, you’re right on. People should never live their lives doing what others think they should do. Sadly, society tells us many things – you should do this, you should be that… The reality is, there are going to be people who fit into a mold, and more power to them, they are comfortable there – but if your spirit tells you you need to do something else, then break the mold and live your life because that’s when you truly shine and reach whatever potential you were meant for. Nothing was ever discovered by following the same path.
You say you were never trained to do anything..maybe you weren’t, or maybe your options were left open…maybe you were trained to think for yourself…innovate, lead – without even knowing it.
Keep surrounding yourself with people who push you forward, who say “wow, you’re going to do that? its bold, but go for it!” and when people around you are afraid or push their fears onto you – well keep moving forward because when you reach your goals and see your vision realized, they will see it to. Thats when you *become* inspiration.
We are a tapestry of all different kinds of people in this world, we all work together in our own ways, and the best way we can contribute is to be true to ourselves , our vision & surround ourselves with people who see it.
Nice post Matt, I am glad you took the time to share your thoughts with us. I for one am excited to see what you do next, I am honored to have you as a friend!
Nick…I know, still would love to chat soon when convenient for you.
This is all new thinking to me, well, new as in the last 24 months has been an evolution into taking my life back from what I had allowed it to become. I completely agree and love how you said one experiment leads to another…so goes life. No matter how much you plan something it never, ever goes as you thought it would go…even if you actually reach your goal the road there was different than expected.
Cheers Nick, I really appreciate it!!
Wow Mila, amazing comment…still absorbing it!
I agree with what you said, all of it. Society does have this power to conform us but it cannot do it unless we give it permission. We are each destined for different things and I for one have just been ready to jump off the treadmill and create my own path.
Slowly over the last couple of years this has become cleaer to me as I have evolved and trusted myself more. Still a long ways to go and to be able to make money along this new path will soon need to be answered…but I’m having a blast!
I am very glad to know you and have the support and kindness of people like you. Cheers Mila!
Dude, this was really good. Very heart-felt and now I know one more reason we resonate.
Funny how being an entrepreneur is a lot like you described. We had an urge and we took the initiative to figure shit out.
Someone said “ah we don’t do it that way” and I am saying WHY NOT?
If I have the chutzpah to take the time to think of what would make this better and more efficient, who are they do say “We don’t do it that way?”
This is why America is in trouble, we lost our adventurous “what if mindset.”
Well, not me! SO dude, I celebrate you doing what ever makes your heart sing with Glee.
You rock Michele, thank you. Still figuring it all out, and to be honest I hope I never figure it all out. I’m happier experimenting than I am living under someone else’s “system”…
Cheers to you and that adventurous “why not” life!!
Love the sentiments here, Matt! This reminds me of a John Dewey quote I came across earlier today: “Education is a process of living and not a preparation for future living.” Cheers!
Love that David, thanks for sharing it with me!! Cheers back atcha my wine & foddie friend!